Impressions - Portland Edition

1.Where did the sidewalks go?
2. I want a tattoo, too.
3. My hair is definitely not rockstar enough.
4. Where did all this nature come from? I’ve almost walked into five spider webs.
5.I can’t believe Sandra is complaining about the humidity.
6.Do two-story homes exist around here?
7.Wow, their attempt at growing corn is pathetic.
8.This oyster tastes like mashed potatoes.
9.I miss mashed potatoes.
10.I really like how I don’t feel like I’m melting all day long. Thank you, overcast sky.
11.I should have brought my guitar. Everyone else here has guitars.
12.Just Starbucks? Guess I expected some sort of “Portland’s Own”.
13.Where’s Wal-Mart?
14.I wonder if they know that I’ve never heard of the term “die back” when referring to grass losing its greenness. I guess we always just say it ‘dies’. Well, after it’s covered by snow.
15.Oh, no snow here? That’s sad.
16.FYI – we light our bridges in Peoria, too.
17.Is that a homeless boy or a homeless girl? I can’t tell.
18.Where’s the ghetto?
19.The Rose Bowl sounds less wimpy when you realize it was named for all the roses in Portland. Ok, no it doesn’t.
20.What’s wrong with ordering chicken tenders?
21.All of that nature and only one mosquito bite. Who would have thought?
22.Clams are squeaky. I don’t think I can eat more than five.
23.I definitely can’t eat more than five.
24.I think I’ll visit again!
25.I’m ready for Edward to carry me up this tree, now.